Counselor in South Tulsa


Who do you want to be?  How does that person look?  How does that person think?  What does that person do?  What kind of partner, parent, child, sibling, friend, co-worker, employee, employer, community member is that person?  Are you that person?  If not, why not?  What’s keeping you from being that person?  I bet you could be that person.  What do you have to do to become that person?


First, you have to decide who you want to be.  Many people have no idea who they want to be.  They started down a path years ago based on whatever seemed good or smart or easy or cool or whatever at that time.  Since then, inertia, comfort, or fear has kept them on that path without much thought to what else might be out there.  If that’s you, STOP, take some time, and think about what you really want for your life.  Answer all those questions from the start of this post.


Once you have an idea of who you want to be, you have to take an honest self-assessment.  You have to identify your strengths as well as your liabilities.  And you have to be thorough.  Everything is connected to everything.  Everything matters.  You have to look at all areas of your life.  Once you’ve identified who you are, you can see the distance between the current state and the end goal.


Once you know who you want to be, you have to make a game plan.  You have to put together a plan of action that will get you from who you are to who you want to be.  This change doesn’t happen overnight, and you can’t change 100 things all at once.  You have to start with broad goals and narrow those goals down into attainable milestones.  You can’t lose 100 lbs. immediately, but you can lose five or ten lbs. and then five or ten more and so on.  You’re probably not going to double your income immediately, but you can figure out how to boost it a little at a time or put yourself in a different position or career that will change your earning potential.  Not only do you have to identify the milestones, you have to identify the specific steps you will take to reach these milestones.  These would be things like lowering your sugar intake, exercising three times per week, asking for a promotion, scheduling a weekly date night.  You know, things you can do that will move you closer to your goals, closer to the person you want to be.  If you approach your plan like this and update it as things change over time, you’ll eventually get where you want to be.


Now, once you have the game plan, it’s time for the good stuff, the work.  You have to start doing the things.  This is the hardest part.  It will take discipline, consistency, accountability support.  It will take a lot.  But this is also the most important part, because nothing happens without it.  The most inspiring goal, the most honest assessment, and the best plan all go nowhere without action.  The flip side is that the action leads to those results you want, and the more you do, the more you will want to do.  The easier it will become to keep doing.  Action brings reward.


Who do you want to be?  Become that person.  Become who you want to be.  Evolve.